Esquinita translates to "little corner". This space comes from a longing for going deeper and digging into the juicy magic of our lives. Here you'll find real stories, inspiration, connection, ease, abundance and joy. xo, Gaby
Tuesday, February 16th will be my ninth anniversary living in Miami.
Nine years ago was was an incredibly difficult time for me. I had a one-year old, I was emotionally crushed and in the middle of a divorce, I left my beloved Brooklyn and my dear friends. I moved here to be closer to family. I was heartbroken, lost, and thought I would have to settle in a city that circumstances chose for me.
It was rough. Really rough.
You know how many times I told that story in my life?
Too. Many. F*ckin. Times.
That's how many.
Every time I would bring it up, I would feel the weight and sadness of it. The emotional charge was palpable. I would feel my righteousness. All the unresolved anger of that time. It kept me from making a real home here. It kept me feeling like a victim.
It took a lot of years to see it, heal it, and recognize that I had allowed that story to define me for far too long. It took...
Every December, I share my lessons for the year.
And then, there's 2020.
On the year that brought us a global pandemic, a massive opportunity to shift in consciousness (and also brought me my 40th birthday), the lessons went deeper than they ever have.
Here we go:
When I started feeling the call to create a program on Pleasure, it felt guided, joyful, and so right. I was deep in the flow.
And then, shortly before I announce it - I woke up one day with this one loud thought "Who am I to talk about pleasure? I feel like a fraud."
This thought shook me. I felt a sinking feeling of "Maybe I need to cancel this."
Luckily, I have learned to rely on my people. My friend Jaime saw right through my bullshit and very matter-of-factly shared:
"You're actually the best person to teach about pleasure."
And suddenly it all made perfect sense.
I am the "structure" person. I am the person who finds it hard to let go, and not have everything planned. I am the person who needs a solid schedule. I am the person who grew up prioritizing the to-do list and never finding time for pure enjoyment. I am the person who couldn't enjoy myself without feeling guilty.
I have suffered this internal battle for much of my life.
The past couple of weeks have been an emotional rollercoaster for me.
Between health scares, losing a family friend to covid-19, heavy and unexpected ups and downs with family and friends - it has been...a lot.
And at the same time, I've become better than ever at something really important: honoring my emotional and mental health.
That has meant postponing meetings, pushing back deadlines, ordering takeout and rewatching old shows (right now it's Frasier).
"Old Me" would have felt guilty AF about all of this. I would have had to be in a hospital to not work. Now? I know it's the smartest thing I can do.
In the rush to get back to normal, we get to re-evaluate our society's obsession with productivity and profit, over your wellbeing.
As so many entrepreneurs are struggling to keep their businesses afloat in this environment, there is also an opportunity to rethink your business from a new consciousness.
If you were making yourself sick...
Being in Miami for an entire Summer is a new experience.
As many of us do in South Florida, I usually jump at the chance to leave town in the Summer. I love taking extended vacations when my son is out of school and living/vacationing in other places in July.
And well, like many of us. This Summer I am here.
Life slowing down in the time of Covid has given me an opportunity to be at peace with being here, and to connect to this land this time of year in a way I never have.
For starters, I'm having a beautiful affair...with the Poinciana tree in my backyard. We love each other.
Earlier this week, when I saw the documentary of Walter Mercado's life, and I heard him talk about how he is in a relationship with nature, the wind, life...I knew exactly what he was talking about.
While most of my life during this time I'm disconnecting, exploring, filling up with new people, places, and experiences...this Summer I am powerfully rooting in the simplest and...
Last week felt like a month for many of us. And here we are. Ready. Now what?
We start with grounding. This can be as simple as taking steps to remember who you are, to feel safe, to trust, to know you can talk to others in a safe space, to rest, or even to receive inspiration for joyful creativity.
Join us for our second weekly Grounding Circle tonight at 8PM by clicking here:
If you'd like to receive a calendar invite for these weekly Grounding Circles, please add your email here.
Huge virtual hugs
When we are getting ready to let go of something, there's a spectrum between resisting your way through and surrendering into it.
You always play somewhere within that spectrum. The thing is, that no matter how you're playing the game, deep down you always know.
You know that it's time to go, even if it may just be too terrifying to face it.
I hear you.
This is how the most traumatic moments of my life played out (e.g., getting divorced, quitting my job to become an entrepreneur, moving to Miami). Let's just say they were "extra" extra. I was so terrified of accepting that it was time to let go, and I resisted my way through it.
Over the past few years, I've learned and practiced a deeper opening to life's experiences, and more importantly a trust in myself and what I'm here to create. That trust in yourself is the fuel that drives living courageously and finally letting go of what is no longer serving you.
At the end of the...
Recently one of our Comadres asked me to dive deeper into what I meant by "Shadow work."
I had been feeling intuitively that this was something I needed to address much more head on, and so the message from the universe came loud and clear.
Your "Shadow" is your fear. It's the part of you that is scared, terrified of the unknown, unwilling to take risks or alter the status quo. It's the voice in your head that has you wondering whether you should really go for that opportunity, making you feel "less than". Your Shadow leads to self sabotage, paralysis, outbursts, and a whole lot of stress.
It's the subconscious at work producing the opposite result of the thing that you say you want (e.g., money, love, impact, success, connection).
It's also a real and genuine part of you. And all she really wants is to keep you safe.
And yet, so much of what we find on the topic is along the lines of "F*ck your fears!" This approach is incredibly...
Recently I have fully integrated an important lesson, that I can't wait to share with you:
Over the past month we made some changes to our Las Comadres community. They were necessary for us to remain sustainable and build from a strong place as we grow and provide an incredible experience to every woman here. With the changes came an invitation for us all to level up and step into big and bold together.
While some embraced and celebrated these changes, I was cracked open, feeling others' resistance to the same news. It was honestly an emotional rollercoaster on several occasions.They were reflecting my own fears and resistance back to me.
And suddenly one day, I decided to remember that I am guided, that I am supported, that I can let go, stop resisting, and flow with...